If you’re new to faith, you’ve probably heard people say, “You need to have a relationship with God.”
But what does that actually mean?
I remember hearing that phrase and feeling completely confused.
I grew up Catholic. Maybe your story is different. Maybe you didn’t grow up with faith at all. And that’s okay.
I went to church on Sundays, prayed every once in a while, and owned a Bible. But if I’m being honest, it mostly sat on a shelf collecting dust.
So when people talked about having a relationship with God, I didn’t really understand what they meant or why it mattered so much.
Now, a little over two years into following Jesus, I can honestly say that prioritizing my relationship with God has been the most life changing decision I’ve ever made.
And I call it a journey because that’s exactly what it is. There isn’t a finish line. You’ll continue growing closer to God for the rest of your life, discovering more of who He is and who He created you to be.
The best part?
It only gets better.
What a Relationship with God Is Not
Let’s clear up a few common misconceptions.
Having a relationship with God is not:
- Being perfect or never sinning.
- Knowing everything about Christianity or the Bible.
- Having all the answers.
- Earning God’s love through good behavior.
- Something you “complete” in a certain amount of time.
If you’ve been waiting until you have everything figured out before coming to God, you don’t have to.
He invites you to come exactly as you are.
So What Is a Relationship with God?
The simplest way I can explain it is this.
A relationship with God is very similar to a healthy relationship with someone you deeply love.
Think about a close friend, your spouse, or a family member.
How did that relationship grow?
You spent time together.
You talked.
You listened.
You learned about each other.
You trusted one another.
The same is true with God.
He isn’t looking for people who simply know about Him.
He desires to know you personally.
He cares about your fears, your dreams, your questions, your victories, and even the things you’re too embarrassed to tell anyone else.
When you’re hurting, He wants you to run to Him.
When you’re celebrating, He wants to celebrate with you.
When you’re confused, He wants to guide you.
That kind of closeness is what Scripture invites us into.
So, How Do You Build That Relationship?
Just like any meaningful relationship, it grows one conversation at a time.
Here are a few simple ways to get started.
Talk to Him
Prayer doesn’t have to sound formal or impressive.
Talk to God the way you’d talk to someone who loves you.
Tell Him what’s on your heart.
Thank Him.
Ask questions.
Ask for help.
Even if it feels awkward at first, keep showing up.
Read Your Bible
The Bible is how we learn who God is and what His character is like.
You don’t have to read for an hour every day.
Start with one chapter.
I recommend beginning with the Gospel of John because it introduces you to who Jesus is.
As you read, ask yourself:
- What does this teach me about God?
- What can I learn about how He wants me to live?
Write It Down
Journaling has been one of the biggest game changers in my own faith.
Write your prayers.
Write your questions.
Write what you’re learning.
Write moments where you see God answering prayers or showing up in unexpected ways.
Looking back at those pages one day will remind you how faithful He’s been.
Spend Time With Him Daily
Relationships grow through consistency, not perfection.
Even 10 to 15 intentional minutes each day can begin changing your heart.
Some days you’ll feel incredibly close to God.
Other days you may not feel much at all.
Don’t let your feelings determine whether you spend time with Him.
Keep showing up.
He’s there whether you feel Him or not.
If You’re Just Starting
You don’t need to clean up your life before coming to God.
You don’t need to know the Bible from cover to cover.
You don’t need to have all your doubts resolved.
You simply need to take the next step.
God isn’t asking you to become the perfect Christian overnight.
He’s inviting you into a relationship that will transform you over time.
One conversation.
One prayer.
One chapter.
One day at a time.
And if I can leave you with one piece of encouragement, it’s this.
Don’t focus on becoming the perfect Christian. Focus on getting to know Jesus.
Because the more you know Him, the more you’ll begin to trust Him.
The more you trust Him, the more you’ll experience His peace.
And before long, you’ll realize something beautiful.
The relationship you were searching for with God was never about earning His love.
It was about discovering that He loved you first.
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